My
Thoughts
My spirit is frayed. My body is weary.
My mind wanders desperately seeking something.
I need a reason. I need an excuse.
Even a lie will do although I prefer the truth.
Anything to bring release from this emptiness.
This long tunnel of night terrors sucking me downward.
Hope's light is dimming. I'm suffocating.
Poisonous
air of demand permeating the air I breathe.
Your resentment and analytical judgment searing
into my soul.
Where once was sympathy and empathy you now call
me weak.
Look at me and see a Courage- a Fighter - a Survivor.
Help me when I ask - but not until I ask.
Doubting me not but lending support.
Let me lean on you when I'm too tired to take
another step.
Unless you've been me in both mind and spirit
don't tell me what to do.
Talk to me. Don't speak for me.
I have a mind and I can think.
I have a mouth and I can speak.
Don't talk down to me or look down your nose at me.
Give me the respect that I deserve.
Not that hopeless look or the disgusted look.
Just when I think I see a ray of sunshine
out comes a rain cloud and leaves me wet and cold.
Walking Alone
It was Spring, a warm May evening.
It was a soft, sexy evening.
I was walking alone once more.
Everyone was with someone
except for me and I was all alone.
It
seemed everything important always
happened outside the house.
Nothing new or exciting was happening
on the inside of the house.
I found myself not wanting to go back
inside of the lonely house.
It
is harder for me to heal without you
by my side.
It seems you don't care enough to want
to help.
Words are nice but sometimes I would
rather see action.
It
is so much easier for me to be depressed.
It's easily indulged.
But I have discovered that it takes guts and
a determined spirit.
To be willing to seek help even if I have to
walk alone or even survive alone.
Faces
Every face I see walking down the street
Has another face behind it.
Some faces are diabolical,genius and
some are deceitful.
I hear ghosts in the howling winds
calling out my name.
Old memories and new ones alike are
bizarre and so discomforting they
throw up walls of resistance.
Clouds of fog overtake me once more...
Can someone please help me find a light
to end this darkness?
The
Tuning Fork
My heart works like a tuning fork.
When my heart is in tune with an ideal
I know it. I feel the harmony within.
Sometimes my heart knows that something
is definitely not working.
Opinions and judgments need to be
carefully thought about.
I need to listen to my heart.
And pass judgment with my head.
